5 Life Lessons:Adjusting My Crown

July 28, 2017

Coco Chanel said it best, “a woman who cuts her hair is about to change her life.” I never truly analyzed that famous quote until I walked out of the salon with my curly tapered cut wondering to myself “what the hell did I just do”. The shock of cutting 5-6 inches of my hair off on a whim was nothing short of an immediate emotional rollercoaster. I knew I didn’t hate the cut (we all know that feeling of a bad hairstyle and wanting to run for the hills) but I also knew I was treading in super unfamiliar territory.

 

Yes I did cut my hair “Halle Berry short” eight years ago but the reality is I had a relaxer! Never have I had short hair as a “natural girl” which to me screams more work. And let me tell you in advance I’m NOT one of those girls who can recreate their stylists masterpieces when they get home or can go on YouTube and follow all 20 steps to creating the best twist out ( most of mine don’t work until my 30th try).

 

So here I am sipping coffee as a full-fledged #cutlife inductee and I’m finally getting an understanding of what home girl Coco was really talking about. She wasn’t only speaking of women that are drastically revamping their lives and looking to hit the refresh button by chopping off their locs of love. She was also saying plain and simple…if you cut your hair be prepared for some shit to pop off. Shit as in some major changes lol. Some changes in the way you see yourself, the way others see you, society sees you, and just being prepared for some emotional stuff to start bubbling up that you didn’t even have on your list to go to counseling for.(Especially as a black woman. You know how we feel about our hair)

 

Girl yes, all of this over hair. But looking on the bright side I can honestly say I’ve grown to REALLY like my new curly cut & more importantly the lessons I’m learning! And like our girl CC said if you get a short cut get ready for a major life turn-up. So without further ado here are my 5 life lessons I’ve learned by going short!

 

Lesson #1: I have the freedom to mold myself into whomever I want to be! Even if it is the exact opposite of who I wanted to be 20 minutes ago. Simply because we have the right to change our minds. Even if that means changing from a previous vision we were going hard for.

 

 

 

 

Personal moment: I cut 4 inches of my hair in Nov 2016 and it has grown back longer and thicker than it originally was. Now, I cut it off all over again but even shorter. But it’s cool tho because I’m learning that having history with ANYTHING doesn’t mean you lose your right to “cut it off” or change your direction especially it if it’s no longer serving your highest vision of yourself.

 

Lesson #2: Don’t be afraid of making mistakes! So what if I hate it.( I don’t) Now I know what works for me and what doesn’t. At least I was badass enough to take a risk and see what was on the other side.

 

 

Lesson #3: Confidence is key! The truth is people like what YOU like about YOU! If I feel great about what I’ve got going on people believe my energy. So find a way to appreciate the greatness you’re rockin and others will start flowing off of your vibe.

 

 

Lesson #4: I say “F” other people’s opinions of me! Other’s opinions of me is none of MY business and is always a reflection of them. Whether good or bad it’s not mine to take on. So I’m sticking to my own opinion of myself. So if you like something go for it and if not hang it up and hunt for what you do like.

 

Lesson #5: LEARN to embrace what you’re working with! It can be challenging and uncomfortable trying something new but before you hide it underneath a hat, delete it, move back home, or whatever, TRY to embrace it. It will all be through trial and error but you’ll never know what works and doesn’t work until you give it a REAL try and sometimes that takes time.

 

Personal moment: after my first week of my curly cut I was like “braids it is!!!” but I had to stop myself and realize that just because my hair is taking me outside of my comfort zone doesn’t give me permission to not grow personally and quit on it. I am good for switching up my hairstyles and I’m a sucker for queen like vibes with a turban but in this case I knew by making a braiding appointment  resulted in me running away from my new experience.

 

P.S.I will get braids this summer. Just not for another month or two…balance is key.

 

Whether you’re contemplating cutting your hair, reminiscing on when you did the big chop, standing in solidarity with me, or on the verge of starting a new chapter in life…if you don't know try now these five life lessons transcend the topic of hair. So take these gems as a gift from me to you, pass them along to your best girlfriends, and stay open to embracing all of life’s changes as they continue to mold us into the best versions of ourselves.

 

Share with me three words that describe your hair journey…I would love to know:) 

 

 

XOXO, 

EEH   

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© 2016 by Ebonne Eshaya Holyfield